25 December 2008

What do you mean you can't buy Happyness?

You CAN buy Happyness!!!

In biology, the brain works using something called neurotransmitters, which are released upon certain stimuli from the 'real' world via your senses. e.g. You look at the sun setting, it triggers memories, and you smile.

It so happens that there are certain chemical neurotransmitters called Endorphins, which, when you are stimulated in a certain way, result in you feeling happy. (There was also a report about chocolate having similar effects...)

So that means...

If you could somehow get hold of endorphins, either ingested (eaten), injected or whatever...

Then you CAN actually buy happyness!!!


PS.... I noticed this idea is pretty similar to that episode of Doctor Who (Gridlock, for those of you who want to look it up :) where they were selling drugs in green packets in the stalls...

PPS... Somebody sparked up that the EVIL drug heroin has a similar purpose... however, heroin is made from morphine, and is highly addictive, so I DO NOT suggest you ever, ever, ever take it!!! Ever!
(Not that I'm forcing you to become StraightEdge, as your life is your own choice of course!)
But the great thing about this whole idea is that endorphins are already made by the body itself - they are naturally-occurring chemicals - in fact, if you didn't have any, you wouldn't be human!!!

In effect, you are therefore bypassing the whole neurotransmitter-release stages that heroin has to go through in order to make you feel happy - endorphins are just the end result of taking heroin! (Well what I am led to believe anyway).

All I'm saying is, happyness is just a state of mind, caused by chemicals in the brain. If we could reproduce these chemicals and get them into the brain... then it would be true that you can buy happyness :)

"Meh" has been added to the dictionary!!!

Just google it to find out!!

9 December 2008

100 Fun Things to Do During a Boring Lecture

If you like the idea of doing the mexican wave during a boring lecture, read the webpage below for many, many more ways to poke fun at your lecturer, or just have a bit of fun.


If all else, fails you could actually listen to what the lecturer is saying!!
(No chance.)


22 September 2008

Do you need alcohol to have a good time?

Computer says No.

You shouldn't need to drink in order to forget your emotions and feelings.
You should be able to control your emotions in all aspects and situations so that you don't end up doing things that can ruin you.
I have my bad and depressing times but I deal with them by purely thinking them over and then finding a way of resolution, or finding something to keep my mind off it like having a wank or about making something new like a blog post. Something I can do that will make either me or the world just that tiny little bit better.
In this way, I am taking something bad, and channelling the energy into something good - also called "Sublimation". Some psychologists believe that all success is the result of sublimation - fore example, the perspective of becoming a failure forces the person to ensure they don't become like that, and so they pursue an achievable goal.

Sublimation is a defence mechanism - and a defense mechanism helps the ego (the part of the mind that surfaces into reality) cope with anxiety.
(Read more on Wikipedia here)

And what about trying to enjoy yourself?

(1:26 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: hehe ill force drink u beer
(1:26 AM) Trebor™ : hahha only on certain conditions lol
(1:26 AM) Trebor™ : but dont force me lol theres no point in drinking it
(1:27 AM) Trebor™ : i dont need to get drunk in order to see people as attractive
(1:27 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: getting tipsy on drink is fair but smashed there is no point which is stoopid
(1:28 AM) Trebor™ : sometimes i think i act tipsy when im high on sugar lol
(1:28 AM) Trebor™ : i just do stupid little things lol
(1:28 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: sugar is dumb... it just rots teeth
(1:28 AM) Trebor™ : but i dont run around like hyper lol not like that
(1:29 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: drink causes pointless random lauffin or random crying which is as good as
(1:29 AM) Trebor™ : i can do that without drinking
(1:29 AM) Trebor™ : i do it all the time lol
(1:29 AM) Trebor™ : ill be on the bus and then cant help myself laughing at something
(1:30 AM) Trebor™ : or theres a joke and i get it and i keep laughing for like 5 whole minutes after the joke
(1:30 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: riight but that just aint fun tho...
(1:30 AM) Trebor™ : and crying i do a bit of that now and then
(1:30 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: coz u cant spill anything
(1:30 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: and lauff about it coz ur outa ur mind
(1:30 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: like
(1:31 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: if u get that
(1:31 AM) Trebor™ : spilling things wastes the alcohol lol
(1:31 AM) Trebor™ : waste of money
(1:31 AM) Trebor™ : i wanna be in my mind thats what i like about myself the most
(1:31 AM) Trebor™ : i dont wanna lose my mind
(1:31 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: buttt if ur a lil out of it, who gives a shit then..
(1:31 AM) Trebor™ : i will submit to losing my body but my mind i never wanna lose that
(1:32 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: i loose my mind wen i am sober
(1:32 AM) Trebor™ : lol
(1:32 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: lol
(1:32 AM) Trebor™ : i never want to be out of control
(1:33 AM) Trebor™ : i never want anything going on with my mind that i cant control
(1:33 AM) Trebor™ : good or bad
(1:33 AM) Trebor™ : ive had sum bad expereicens before omggg
(1:34 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: well my ex never drank then i stoped having my random alchole times...
u wont believe how depressed i got coz i never showed any happiness
till i got tipsey again i recovered my boring depression state
(1:34 AM) Trebor™ : if i ever lose track of my mind i have to shutdown i close my eyes and cover my ears
(1:34 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: u wont be totally out of control...
(1:35 AM) Trebor™ : i can control my depression
(1:35 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: coz i know wt im doin but pretend im not coz i dont care bout loosing my dignity
(1:35 AM) Trebor™ : i do care lol cos ive fucked up before
(1:35 AM) Trebor™ : you do know deguassing yeh?
(1:35 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: well if u dated my ex depression was a natural friend
(1:35 AM) Trebor™ : haha lol
(1:36 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: deguassing ?
(1:36 AM) Trebor™ : im familiar with darkness but i know i am in control of it
(1:36 AM) Trebor™ : degauss
(1:36 AM) Trebor™ : on CRT monitors
(1:36 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: oh yea
(1:36 AM) Trebor™ : well sometimes my mind goes like that
(1:36 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: lol oh dear
(1:37 AM) Trebor™ : everything im looking at its like.. the picture in my eyes... everything shakes side to side and gets smaller
(1:37 AM) Trebor™ : just like someboys pressed deguass in my mind
(1:37 AM) Trebor™ : and it repeats again and again
(1:37 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: awhh
(1:37 AM) Trebor™ : its fucking wierd and i hate it
(1:37 AM) Trebor™ : i get it when im really really worrying
(1:38 AM) Trebor™ : or im really really ill or something
(1:38 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: well that sounds like summin drugs would do - after watching it on tv/movies...
(1:39 AM) Trebor™ : and im afraid if i drank i would start to worry about everything more and it would happen
(1:39 AM) Trebor™ : and i would look like a spaz
(1:39 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: u wount worry
(1:39 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: dw... wen u got m8s with ya thats the last thing u'd do
(1:40 AM) xxxxxxxxxxxxx =: u'd just get like crazy hyper...


Lots to talk about, instead of several blogs, it's one.

Firstly, Windows XP Service Pack 3 has been released... yadda yadda yadda...
So just download it and get that outta the way, otherwise you won't be able to get any more updates. Some people say it actually speeds up your XP, but I'm not so sure.


It gives you a sense of ability and strength.

The definition of a hero is someone who "in the face of danger and adversity or from a position of weakness, display courage and the will for self-sacrifice, that is, heroism, for some greater good, originally of martial courage or excellence but extended to more general moral excellence."

Having confidence will bring you happiness. The lack of it will bring you sadness.
It can manifest as going out, talking to people, shopping, getting down with work, and generally being happy.

Think. If you are not confident at all, you won't make any impulses or take any actions. Confidence is the meaning of standing up for what you feel is right, and so it makes you happy to feel like this – you may stand on your own but the more confidence you have the more friends you will have.

Confidence eradicates doubt and unhappiness. It makes you feel like you can stand around anywhere and not be fearful or other people who may be looking at you and what you're doing.


Friends are a source of support, to let you know what might happen should you do something and not know of the consequences. To get friends, you need to be confident. Get rid of the idea that the person might not like you, because the fact is, you can't make everyone happy.


Love will find you. You have to go out and find your friends, but love will find you. Don't look for it, don't force it to come on, and don't go out places just to find love. It will find you.

And finally... =]

4 September 2008

Good points and bad points about alcohol

- I can be an open and entertaining person without alcohol. (When I think of the word entertaining, I think of people in football shirts shouting "wahey!" and waving their arms in the air, and doing a crazy dance with it). All I need is a little confidence to be stupid and some good music to get me moving. Alcohol provides a state of mind, apart from just creating a physical change (dehydration of the brain), the actual "way you see the world" when you're drunk can be recreated without alcohol, you just have to let whatever thoughts come into your mind... out. Some people rely on alcohol in order to get to this state of happiness, but I get the idea that being reliant on substances in order to make you "feel" a certain way makes you weak - you should be able to do it with your mind alone. I am a cold thinker I must admit.
- Alcohol dehydrates the brain, which is why you feel light-headed. This can cause actual damage to brain cells, but then "you only live once", don't you?
- If I got drunk, I wouldn't be the happy-happy type. Because I hate alcohol so much (I actually feel like being Straight Edge is the most important part of my identity), I'd be going around smashing alcohol bottles up and probably, because I'm a pretty horny guy and I can somehow relate absolutely everything to sex, I would be doing it with everyone.
- When some people drink too much, they end up doing stupid things, like punching walls, punching people, or driving cars when they are "over the limit". I believe alcohol causes more problems than some people think it solves.
- Some people smoke only when they are drunk - and mixing the two is even more dangerous to the entire body - the lungs and the bloodstream. (Cigarettes contain over 3,000 chemicals, did you know?) And of course, smoking is just completely pointless and futile. It is without any single benefit or advantage to anyone, compared against everything else ever created.
- Too much, and you die. (Mind you, drinking too much water or eating too much can also kill you).

  • Euphoria (BAC = 0.03 to 0.12%).
    • Subject may experience an overall improvement in mood and possible euphoria.
    • They may become more self-confident or daring; they may become more friendly or talkative, and/or social.
    • Their attention span shortens. They may look flushed.
    • Their judgment is not as good—they may express the first thought that comes to mind, rather than an appropriate comment for the given situation. See: in vino veritas
    • They have trouble with fine movements, such as writing or signing their name.
  • Lethargy (BAC = 0.09 to 0.25%)
    • Subject may become sleepy.
    • They have trouble understanding or remembering things, even recent events. They do not react to situations as quickly.
    • Their body movements are uncoordinated; they begin to lose their balance easily, stumbling; walking is not stable.
    • Their vision becomes blurry. They may have trouble sensing things (hearing, tasting, feeling, etc.).
  • Confusion (BAC = 0.18 to 0.30%)
    • Profound confusion—uncertain where they are or what they are doing. Dizziness and staggering occur.
    • Heightened emotional state—aggressive, withdrawn, or overly affectionate. Vision, speech, and awareness are impaired.
    • Poor coordination and pain response. Nausea and vomiting sometimes occurs.
  • Stupor (BAC = 0.25 to 0.40%)
    • Movement severely impaired; lapses in and out of consciousness.
    • Subjects can slip into a coma; will become completely unaware of surroundings, time passage, and actions.
    • Risk of death is very high due to alcohol poisoning and/or pulmonary aspiration of vomit while unconscious.
    • Loss of bodily functions can begin, including bladder control, breathing, heart rate.
  • Coma (BAC = 0.35 to 0.50%)
    • Unconsciousness sets in.
    • Reflexes are depressed (i.e., pupils do not respond appropriately to changes in light).
    • Breathing is slower and more shallow. Heart rate drops. Death usually occurs at levels in this range.
Long term effects for moderate drinkers -

- Good for the heart and the blood (antioxidants etc. ------> The same antioxidants can be obtained from grapes, blackberries and chocolate :D). Alcohol increases HDL ("good cholesterol"), decreases thrombosis (blood clotting), reduces fibrinogen (a blood clotter), increases fibrinolysis (clot dissolving), reduces artery spasm from stress, increases coronary blood flow and increases insulin sensitivity -- all good for heart health.[20][21] Additionally, Thrombosis is lower among moderate drinkers than teetotalers.
- Less likely to suffer heart attacks (even non-drinkers).
- Reduced risk of coronary heart disease / coronary vascular disease / peripheral arterial disease / intermittent claudication.
- If you have already had a heart attack, drinking will help you survive the next.
- Reduced risk of stroke (only if one drink per week).
- Lower risk of developing gallstones, kidney stones, diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis.

Long term effects for heavy drinkers -

- Inability to make new brain cells.
- Dementia --> Alzhemiers
- Tremors
- Psychological cases such as cravings, hallucinations
- In some studies, weight gain has been shown.
- Some studies suggest more likely chance of cancer developing.
- Poor foetal development.
- Aging such as poor brain development (as above) and skin recovery.

1 September 2008

What are the symptoms of a computer virus?

Because I know so many people that have viruses/spyware/malware/badware/phishing scams/smitfraud/trojans/worms/zombie infected computers,
I've decided to make a list of things that viruses might to do your computer.

One simple point: viruses might be very good at getting into your computer, but they aren't very good at hiding themselves.

The best software I know is ZoneAlarm Internet Security Suite.
Other software I've tried that just wasn't as good as this includes:
- Symantec Norton
- AVG/Grisoft
- Kaspersky
- BitDefender
- F-Secure
- Comodo
- Microsoft Windows OneCare
- PC Tools

Here are some telltale signs of viruses:
- The sounds your computer makes when you turn it on are either wrong or staggered
- Your desktop wallpaper changes without notice
- When on Internet Explorer, and trying to visit pages, it takes you to the wrong ones
- There are new toolbars and menus on Internet Explorer that you never had before
- Windows Live Messenger/MSN sends people messages with URLs (website addresses) in that you never wrote down
- Lots of emails are sent through Outlook Express or other emails that you never sent yourself
- Programs and popups come up on your computer (called something like Antivirus XP 2008) saying that your computer is infected and that you need to buy the software in order to remove it.
- Your computer restarts without doing anything at all
- Lots of icons appear on your desktop and don't know what they are for or why they are there.
- Your computer is a lot slower to startup, turn off or even do anything
- You see black screens in boxes that come up on the screen that may have white text in them or not
- You try to open anything on your computer and it doesnt work

Here are some websites where you can scan your computer for free.
- http://www.personalfirewall.comodo.com/scan/avscanner.html
- http://support.f-secure.com/enu/home/onlineservices/fshc/front.html
- http://www.iolo.com/threatcenter/virusscanstart.aspx
- http://us.mcafee.com/root/mfs/default.asp?affid=105
- http://onecare.live.com/site/en-GB/default.htm

And for your firewall:
- https://www.grc.com/x/ne.dll?bh0bkyd2
- http://www.pcflank.com/scanner1s.htm

22 August 2008

Justifying Straight Edge

Ever since I can remember I have always hated alcohol, cigarettes and drugs... in my eyes it is just completely wrong, for me it is almost torture to hear about it or see people doing or taking any of them. I just see it all as completely pointless, there is absolutely no benefit, advantage or profit that you can get out of smoking or taking drugs - and as I have realised also, alcohol.

I myself have never done any of these things, except taking painkillers but that when when I couldn't take the physical pain.

People smoke and drink because of their mental pain. I understand that some people drink in order to have fun, but I don't believe people should have to drink in order to enjoy themselves. I would make up points such as, other animals don't do any of these things - they don't need them. Early humans never had access to any of these things, and we wouldn't be without them. People take these things because they lack control over their emotions. They lack the control over the most brilliant gift they could ever receive - and that is their own bodies and minds. And abusing their bodies and minds is wrong - you should use your body and mind in every way you can before you die - but without doing something as stupid as killing your body in the process.

I don't believe there is even a choice. No-one should be allowed any of these things, because they are pointless.

I believe I am strong enough to not give into these evils of society as I call them, and I can solve any pain I have without using them. I see them solely as some kind of addiction or temptation, like something really really wrong.

I have no relation to religion at all, I am anything but religious. I am a scientist at heart and I know that I am alone - I have only myself to find confidence, enthusiasm, strength or resolution.

If I could force the entire world to get rid of each of these things I truly believe the world would be a much healthier and safer place, but that is not my reason for believing this. My main reason is that I just can't understand how some people can't see why something such as smoking gives you nothing good at all - not one single thing. And it puzzles me why people still smoke.

On the other hand, you could consider that all the damage from alcohol, smoking and drugs is a way of keeping the population down... but I am no environmentalist or human-hater either.

I realise that my dreams will never come true but I still persist. If I started doing any of these things I would kill myself, I wouldn't be able to live with it, because I just understand it as being so wrong.

I could write more reasons, but I would be wasting your time.
All I have to say is now this - the most important meaning of life I understand.

Life is all about choices. The choices you make determine who you are, what kind of attitude you have. It is your response to questions or situations that ultimately determines your life - because you are choosing your path.

Life is also about being tolerant of literally everything, and moderating everything so that nothing is damaging or obsessive.

When you take these two things together, you can then choose how you wish to make a change or influence or receive influence through the world. But you must balance between both giving and taking - if you don't do anything to change the world you live in, you are worthless. Similarly if you choose to reject being influenced, encouraged, made to feel a certain way, understand something or take any impact from any person, you too are also worthless.

It's a cold perspective but I understand these as the roots of my mind.



1 July 2008

New Ideas

During my holiday I got over my stubborn prejudice of NOODLES and tried out some Sweet and Sour Pot Noodles, and I must say, with the crunchy bits, they weren't actually bad.

I still need to try out King Du's noodles because the first time I wasn't pretty fond on them, so I got chicken satay or hong kong style chicken + rice, which is slightly blasphemous but still, it tastes goooooooooood.


An advert on BBC with Kelly Holmes in it got me thinking a bit - she said that sports gave her confidence and that it helped her through some "tough times".

Comparing to me, I got my confidence naturally. I still lack confidence when it comes to new things in the real world, but I easily gather it just automatically.
If you are an idea-logical-systems-judging-thinker INTJ like me then you'll understand that yes, concepts and ideas are vital to me, i live in the world of ideas.
But it had never crossed to me that physical endurance and "success" could bring you confidence, but I figured that because personally, I am CRAP at sports, and I even though I do put myself down, I accept it. (Also called learned helplessness for you Wikipedians out there..... mmm...) And I'm not vain, and I don't like being in the spotlight unless I am trying to send out my message like I am now. ButI am fearless of what others think of me, giving me confidence to wear, eat, drink and go out with who-ever I like, be it guys or girls, even though I am commited to my David now =]

The BBC did an article that links Sports and Confidence well -


Realisations -

Being StraightEdge is the next closest thing I hold to my heart.
A BBC report, like the Beeb do, were talking about cracking down on alcohol and youngsters, which in my eyes, is futile, unless serious changes are made, either
- Ban alcohol globally, the most extreme idea I've thought of but still, this is, in my mind, the only way to ensure complete destruction of the possibility of it leaking back (for example, "there is always one that..." - Murphy's Law)
- increase the number of police officers, as Jack Straw suggested - but even this requires the government to make being a police officer seem like a desirable job.
Link: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7430132.stm

And of course, I realised I love IAN WATKINS, the StraightEdge vocalist of Lostprophets, even more...


he might be slightly attracted to men as well as women -

I was reading Kerrang and scanned this in for your approval =]

So there we go!!!!

22 May 2008


Today, I will bring you a short record of everything I have said and recorded.
Divulge in it, if you will.

To start, some quotes from Skins Series 2.

Chris: It's kinda easy when you've got nothing because nothing can be taken away from you, but I don't want nothing anymore.

Makes me think about love and friendship. When love finds you, you start losing touch with everything else, and that includes friends. You don't forget them, they are still there, but you have less time and attention for them. But through this you become greater and stronger friends, because they will also help you through your relationship, and if the two of you really do love each other, then you won't let it break apart.

Cassie: That's people. We arrive, consume all we can and then leave. Like locusts.

Just a quick reminder of humans and overpopulation. Therefore I can justify bringing in this ruddy table. I did this in Biology. We were learning about disease.

Way of killing all life on earth 

Film associated with this


Deep Impact


Soylent Green; Logan's Run

Greenhouse effect; climate change  

The Day After Tomorrow


Twelve Monkeys; Resident Evil; Outbreak; 28 Days Later






Signs; Mars Attacks; Aliens; The Thing


Dr Strangelove or How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb



Failure of procreation     

Children of Men

Law and control      

Logan's Run; Equilibrium; Doctor Who

Lack of morale      



Matrix; Terminator; Transformers

And with that and Biology, I learned that economy is destined to fail, because we produce more waste that recycling them, so eventually we are gonna run of of things to buy and economy will collapse. People will be buying trash instead.


That's what it's there for, so you might as well use it.
Speaks for itself.

Trebor™ is Straight Edge 4 Life ...
(Straight Edge is now the most important part of my identity.)

Define:MSN; 1. A crude and unemotional method of communication, popularised with smiley faces.
(With MSN, you can stop talking to someone for a minute without telling them what you've stopped talking to them for. It's annoying trying to keep up with 5 people at once. In real life you NEVER are actually talk to 5 people at once in VERY deep conversation. It takes time for the brain to process information.

Make "one day...", to-day. Don't wait for oppurtunities to come, they will come to you. Seize them. Pursue them. :D (L) Dave (L)

Yes.... Don't turn down opportunities unless it would be more damaging overall to more than just you. When it comes to love, let love find you. I looked for ages for love and YES, I almost came to the point of thinking about ways to kill myself (upon which I would start humping the bed lol, and yes, I encourage that as IT DOES TEMPORARILY MAKE YOU HAPPY and also, random fact, it is BETTER for guys, if you're trying for a baby, to masturbate quite well before having sex, because, through a BBC report, the longer you leave them stored in there the more likely they will mutate and degrade. If they are fresh they are fully formed. The more exposure they have over time (radiation etc.) the more damaged they will be.)

I am amazed that I have the confidence to say things like that now.
7 months ago I was nothing like this. I had these dirty words in my head but never sought bringing them out. Instead of being a follower there have been times when I am directing.

Another good tip - look for friends and possible partners who have some form of passion. Enthusiasm. Motivation. And that they lack stupid forms of happyness. Essentailly the friends you have will only ever be the ones you share similar interests with (music, films, sports etc.), and thus opinions, but not always.


I think the real emotion that drives intelligence is doubt. Doubt.
That lovely, awkward feeling, when you have a plastic barbie doll going OMG OMG OMG and you are standing there and not sure about whether you should look over so you keep on looking at the pen sitting on the table and think Urgh.
A feeling of the need to escape.
Doubt is what gives me my intelligence.

My style of writing can be cute... or it can be dystopian, as I've mentioned before, or it can be Stream of Consciousness like this blog is, but the main thing that helps me is being witty. Knowing the exact words to say at the right time.

The key to being witty is not always the wide choice of vocabulary or intelligence, it is more listening to the ringing bells within your mind (ringing true). Like if you've handed in a piece of coursework but you know you've missed something out but couldn't be bothered to fix it so you're gonna wait until you get it back so you can wait until your teacher tells you to fix it.

Oh yep, I realised people like patterns, yep, thats an important one. (Think about how many times you say "like" every day). If there are patterns (thus synchronicity and the "23" effect), life becomes a lot easier because then you can categorise things down into groups instead of making more groups.

2 April 2008


I have found the fifth meaning of life, and probably, the most important.


Lie is about finding your own way of having fun.

But you should not think that the only way to have fun is to be drinking, using drugs, gambling, eating, shopping, having sex, smoking, or working (which is exactly why I'm Straight Edge :D hehehhe)

They key point with me is that I'm too serious all the time, and that stops me rom having fun. I take everything too seriously and dig too deep into it, I don't let it pass over and fade away. I need to loosen up and be a little rebellious insteas of reasoning everything out all the time.

If you haven't a clue what this weird thing called "fun", is, take a look at this site.

I mean, if you tie this into "Moderation" - you have to make sure then when you're having fun, you don't go too far, or you could be in serious trouble.

So whether you're at college, working, going out and socialising, watching television, listening to music, reading a book or a magazine, playing a game, going on holiday, talking on the phone, playing sports or even just cleaning up around the house, remember....

enjoy every moment


9 March 2008


I almost wasn’t gonna post this, so I’m sorry if its crap.

Meaning of Life

Pretty much this "joke" (I subscribe to ArcaMax to get free jokes daily... I am so fucking sad) sums up a lot of changes in my lately:

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, "Woo hoo! What a ride!"

I would give you my complete "Meaning of Life" but want to save that for my book. Lol. If I ever get away from this stupid computer shizzz.

But basically, life is split into four main points -

Problems/Understanding - without an understanding of the world and how to cope with it, you cannot survive.

Survival - knowing how to avoid disease, battle against competition, the instinct to keep away from anything bad including people etc.

Moderation/Tolerance/Mediation/Assertiveness/Justice/Balance - for every situation and choice you come across, the best way to approach it is with assertiveness (not being completely passive but not completely aggressive - to be neutral but active). You must be able to tolerate a lot of things and ignore stubbornness/denial (a 1st level defence mechanism in basic psychology lol). You should also try out as many things as you can to bring out your inner extrovert, and stop being isolated and quiet all the time (I was always like that until I realised all this).

Influence - how are you going to change the world? How are you going to help people? A quote from Matt Bellamy (Muse) about Atheism made me really think about this - ""Being an atheist means you have to realise that when you die, that really is it. You’ve got to make the most of what you’ve got here and spread as much influence as you can. I believe that you only live through the influence that you spread, whether that means having a kid or making music.""

It really got me thinking - once you’re dead, you’re dead. If you do nothing all your life, the world will exist afterwards as if nothing happened, so it is up to you to try and make as much of an impact as you can.

And of course, these four things form a rich and complex interdependent tapestry. 8-)

That’s my best interpretation of life anyway.
I’ve been working on it for 5 years. :O
I’ve tried to tackle it and improve it in every way that I can, utilising every single experience and situation to perfect this, and I think it is pretty much complete.
My philosophies do go a lot much more beyond this, but I don’t have the time to explain everything I think about. I do record everything I think about, however.

And as I like to think even further after I get used to things, the "joke" above points this out, as does the song "Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)" -

"Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own."

Think about it. If you’ve been born on this planet, you will have been given the greatest gift of all - a mind and a body. And nobody can ever claim these for their own (I mean unless you are kidnapped, but otherwise, you are the sole owner and controller of your body). This means that you should try and use your mind and body in every way, because when you’re dead, you won’t be able to use them ever again. All the opportunities will disappear. Seize every opportunity that comes your way!!!

Okay, so that’s the meaning of life. Right. Next bit.

Futility of Desire
People who know me well will know I am absolutely FUCKING CRAZY about guys and girls. If I see a fit guy I just WANT HIM. But I don’t bloody jump on them, or tell them they are fit or whatever. I can only do that in my mind... LOL!!!!!!

After meeting a few guys and girls I’ve learnt that being a walking emotion (lust/desire) is pointless. If you want to get closer to guy or a girl, treat it like you wanna be their friend. Don’t ever tell they they are gorgeous, but you can drop subtle words about how good they look. If you shout out to people how fit they are (some fucking idiots who’ve messaged me randomly on MySpace AND MSN are like this, and tbh, it does seem weird, OTT and desperate).

So just remember, Friends > Love
Friends are much more important than finding someone to love.

For more inspiration, go to Rachelski’s photosite:

Reality and Fiction
I’ve also had a lot of reality shifts lately... I’ll be daydreaming about an idealistic world or justifying things out in my ming and then suddenly... WOAH... back to reality. I must read "Nausea" by Jean-Paul Sartre (a book about existentialism). Tony was reading it in the first series of Skins. Oh yes he was!!!! AND I MET HIM LOL!

Good Times
Extroversion is taking me over.
I’ve been to 2 gigs already, 30 Seconds to Mars was awesome, NME Gig was awesome, seeing Mitch Hewer was like OMG!!!!!!
Joshiee, Rachelskii and Samed, you are legends =D
Must book more gigs. Any rock gig, whatever.

Thursdays I go Bar 11 to dance a little and see if there are any fit guys...hehehe
Fridays sometimes I go Square, to see the emo kids :D
Sometimes I go Stortford to hang out with some HILARIOUS people.
And OMG I fucking met "aXXo", the movie uploader!!!!! :O
Saturday and Sunday... WORK in Primark :D

I am hoping to join the gym or something, I want muscle. I hate being skinny.



I might try highlights in my hair maybe sometime hehehehe.....

God, I do so much shit on this computer!
I need to listen to more music,watch more films and TV and play more games.

And finally... I need to do college work.


Oh and right now, I love "Moving to New York" by Wombats.

Catch you later dudes!!! GET ME V FESTIVAL TICKETS PLZZZZZ!!!!!!!